one day more

it's finally here, my last night in princeton. quick recap of today and yesterday.

yesterday-

-found out that lauren and i will be living the double-life in our suite next year.

-dinner at blue point grille. experienced fried shrimp for the first time.

-promptly became sick from said shrimp and had gretchen take me to the er at three am. hello, food poisoning.

today-

-saw sunrise.

-slept in late.

-big presentation on policyoptions. went decently well.

-they changed the signs on milk money. coincidental.

-saw sunset.

-buffet at the indian palace. yay for rice and water; loving that liquid diet. bid farewell to michael

-last walk to the victory fountain

tomorrow will end both the new director's meeting and a fabulous summer with people who i've come to really respect. sitting in bed and typing this, i'm thinking about just how much has changed. (change...how many times have i used this word in these posts?) physical changes, emotional changes, relationship changes, habitual changes, location changes, any change imaginable has happened. when we say our goodbyes tomorrow it'll mark possibly the greatest experience of my life thus far in terms of growth. i've learned to put faith not in others, but myself, and that is the biggest change. it seems that everywhere you go in life you find a new part of yourself just waiting to be found. i wonder what i'll find next.

last week in p-ton.

so i told myself that i was going to blog on this every day of my last week here in princeton, but clearly that didn't happen. let's do a quick re-cap of the weekend.

friday- hot as hell. discovered the band summer camp; KILLER. came home to find no internet. odd. realize that the power had gone out. subsequently threw out all of the food in my fridge and high-tailed it to imani's for a sleepover and some awesome e! tv.

saturday- walked back home; felt kind of spectacular. listened to summer camp while i exercised. took a trip to cvs to buy sustanance- froot loops and arnold palmer. ran & did pilates. saw harry potter pt. 2 and cried until i had released every ounce of stress in my body. i love snape. snuck into the foundation to recover imani's shoes. came home and skyped.

sunday- woke up late; glorious. kind of gray outside. walked to d'angelo's and got fixings for a real meal, how grown up of me. saw OFRY as he drove past, yay friends. talked to the g-ma. watched "he died with a falafel in his hand." pretty decent. got my ass kicked by pilates.

today kicked off the new director's meeting. i feel so honored to be among such highly esteemed individuals who have put faith into their passion; youth driven service. i feel like it's the perfect ending to my summer as a bonner foundation intern. we began with our peers at sli, built up our skills over the course of the last two months, and finish off with what could be our future. each day i realize just how much i've loved living here in princeton. despite being terribly homesick some weeks, the moments laughing until i cried over someone slipping the "r" word, yelling at mario for being the annoying little brother, having girl talk with kelly and imani, and seeing parts of other people's bodies that i should probably never see have made me grow. i keep coming back to that same word, don't i? i thought seeing gretchen, dr. j, and patrick today would make me feel like i had come home, but i realized that i already was.

om nashi me

new bag. holla.

the more time that i spend in princeton, the more that i realize how i've changed. a few days ago i used the term "evolve" to describe the slow changes that have occurred in the last month and a half and i feel that it's the most fitting. on friday, i put aside twenty years of fear (or around 17, since i'm guessing i didn't know enough to fear needles in the womb) and got my ears pierced. two of three girls from waynesburg, who were staying at the foundation as a pit stop during their cross-country journey to end the "r" word, joined Liz, Imani, Tyia, and myself for the occasion. sitting on a hospital gurney (going for that medicinal look i guess?) in a lime green room, some dark haired chick with sick tattoos prepped me to face two of my biggest fears: needles and earrings in general. although i made it through without bursting into tears, my usual post-stress fainting happened and i was able to add another fainting location to my list. trenton-check. laughing over pizza and stories after, i felt the relief of someone who has pushed themselves to be what they were called to be all along. the rest of the weekend flew by pretty quickly, resulting with a new vintage coach bag for twelve bucks and a decent night's sleep on sunday.

work has been going well this week as we head into the homestretch. tonight Imani and i went to the princeton student film & video festival and i saw a bunch of clips that continued to reiterate what i've known all along: every day that we live, we grow.

no this is not a test

this originally began as a blog to just blindly put down my day to day life, but i feel like it's becoming something more. tonight imani and i went to go hear some guy (+ girl) sing at small world coffee. i had read something on their door about three weeks ago and decided that it would be a good way to spend a quiet night. i loved being there and hearing his m.ward-esque guitar and megan's (h?) super sweet voice, which was perfect for the french songs they sang. i liked being surrounded by people who also had nowhere to go, but had wandered into the small cafe, just looking to listen. towards the end of the set i turned around to look at one of the paintings for purchase on the wall behind me. i'm not sure why but the image on the left made me remember something. i can't quite put my finger on it, but i felt the urge to go create something of my own. let's see where it'll bring me.

and so i ran, i ran so far away

BURST. today began as a sleepy day but progressed into something more lively. I went for my longest run yet and realized that I have a lot to be grateful for. i'm grateful that I have people like Imani to run to, I'm grateful that I have great friends, I'm grateful that I'm doing fulfilling work (although I often feel unproductive.) It's starting to hit me that I only have two and a half more weeks here, and as excited as I am to head to Maine and start a new year, I am going to miss my intern family. Let's hope we take the time to remember our Princeton roots in the future.

PS. In case you were wondering, yes, the musical titles are a trend.

oh my god i'm back again dum da duh da

It's been a long time since I've written but i'm finally back in princeton! my week off at home/long island/seaside was wonderful but I'm happy to be back in the swing of things here. Work this week hasn't been so stellar. The airport is down so Liz and myself need to walk over to the library everyday to access the internet and work. It makes the day drag on and more often than not I feel myself getting distracted. In terms of day to day things, yesterday I had my first Wegman's experience with Imani and Michael. I didn't get home until 7:30, but it made me realize how much time is still left in the day even if I do come home two and a half hours later than usual. A bagel and one episode of Weeds later, I was feeling jittery and went for a lovely walk around Princeton. Today we had a training with Annie in the afternoon and made our own WDYDWYD signs (Why do you do what you do.) We then had a mini-photo-shoot of each person with his or her sign and I was off home to do laundry, run, and do some yoga. The rest of the week looks exciting, being that we were just issued a new project in partners (yay Da!) to create trainings for the rest of the Bonner network. Thursday Imani and I are going to go see some guy play guitar at Small World Coffee and I think I might check out the Princeton Art Museum; we'll see how it goes. Namaste, friends.

partying and partying yeah

birthday parties are the "it" thing at the bonner foundation; we seem to have one every week. the one constant, regardless of the birthday boy or girl, is the quick ten minute intern scramble to gather as many mismatched decorations as possible. today we celebrated bobby's 50th birthday. gathered around dove bars, flashy 4th of July stars, and chili pepper table toppers, bobby told us how he met his wife. sitting there listening, i began to think about how many of these stories i've heard, and how happy it makes both the story teller and the listener to hear them. this somewhat sparked a new project idea (new blog?) when i got home i tried to decide between yoga and running. my legs were sore from yesterday's trek to imani's but i eventually decided to go running again. i hate running. always have and always will, but there's something satisfying about it. this is me circa four minutes ago back in street clothes and ready to walk to the fountain for some reading and writing. sending love from north tulane.

namaste

last wednesday, i left the dismal looking clouds of princeton and headed to the thunderstorm zone of home for my sister's graduation party. the weekend wasn't so spectacular, but i made many memories with family members and true friends; it was a weekend of realizing who and what mattered. on sunday i traveled back to princeton with a train buddy, my friend chris. it was nice to have company for the ride and hold onto home for just a little bit longer. this week at work has been going pretty well. i've begun to see the other interns as a princeton family. we talk, fight, and are open with one another on a level seen only in close friends. yesterday my friend kenny came to visit for lunch on his way home from rutgers. we caught up over mediocre slices of pizza and i realized just how much has changed in the past year, specifically for the two of us. the work day continued and when i came home i decided to go for a run. it felt wonderful to have my legs burn and hit the concrete; it made me feel almost powerful. today work was kind of slow. i was in a bad mood and slumped around for most of it, but after work we had our first yoga session with bobby's wife. honestly i hadn't felt that free and open for a long time. being in touch with my body has made the things i've been going through for a few days seem okay. i have me and that's all i need.

contentment

so i skipped a few days. oops. on friday, my friend lisa visited me (she could tell i was taking awhile to adjust.) we had a fabulous time galavanting through the kid's street fair, dancing in "the fountain of freedom", and stargazing on an unnamed quad in the corner of princeton's campus. by simply having her here i felt a mini homecoming. finally, princeton felt like mine. saturday was awesome. the interns + michael went out to dinner at the princeton sports bar and ate cheesecake in the foundation's backyard. it was nice to talk about non-work related things (especially foreign films and auto-corrected texts.) this week at work has been pretty good, especially since i've taken the time to go back to the fountain of freedom and write. i feel like princeton is starting to rise another layer. i feel myself growing with every day and, for now, i'm happy with where i am.

the world of cleaning supplies

i am supposed to clean the house this weekend. god help me.

i have not been trained to mop floors

and bang out rugs,

to scrape away scum

and polish banisters.

can we make a trade?

i'll perform lyrical dances

with socked feet

and call it sweeping.

june fire

there's a woman sitting next to me

on the hearth of the princeton library's fireplace

mumbling to no one

about chemical castration on black men.

"why are white people concerned with controlling black people's sexuality?"

as soon as she talks herself to a whisper

the sun breaks through.

dia 1

first real day on the job.

things i've learned:

-leaving the house at 8:20 leaves exactly a half an hour of extra time between getting to the foundation and starting work

-don't accidentally freeze carrots. they go bad.

-four-year-old doritos aren't half bad

-glitter is so hot right now

-clean out drawers. you might find an entire disc full of old-school nick shows

-my kitchen is haunted

-blair hall is beautiful around sunset

side-note: a few weeks ago i watched this movie called "please give" and in one part, the lead female character discusses how chairs have history. i feel like the one in my room has a particularly interesting story. i wish i knew what it was.

riding around with mr. wayne

i've been in princeton for far more than one day total, but i'm only giving a collective response for the past day. yesterday john helped me move into my room. i am glad to say that my short

two weeks as a nomad are over. it's amazing what feeling free is

like, open to go anywhere, anytime. it makes you question why you ever wanted freedom to begin with.

upon arriving at my new home yesterday, john and i were greeted by kwan, a twenty-something thai girl who just completed her masters in piano. when we walked into my room, everything seemed perfect. i had more space than my memory recalled, the bed was comfortable, the lighting was awesome and....there was a giant cross burn on the wall?

sweet omen.

not sure where it came from, but right above my desk is an oval shaped coat of black residue surrounding a cross. the fix? cover it up with my own cross. after two hours of unpacking, john and i explored princeton and basked in the familiar business of life and plans that comforts me.

princeton campus

today started off sluggishly. although my room has ac, it was hot and stuffy the entire night, giving me a handful of awesomely vivid dreams. i hesitantly ventured into the bathroom to take on the high-sided tub/shower combo. despite my initial fear, i learned to appreciate the tiny bathroom's quirks, including the light mist from the shower, the two boxes of "take" supplies left by the last housemate, and the rows of cosmetics in foreign languages. we then headed out for a trip to triumph brewery for lunch. the place was surprisingly big and airy, and hosts live bands on the weekends. if only i was twenty-one. : ( our next stop was back home to pick up my paperwork for the bonner foundation. sitting silently in my room for about ten minutes, a woman started screaming frantically outside for help. emerging from the house, john and i saw an infant precariously teetering on the edge of a stroller while his mother helplessly looked on from behind the stroller, her pinkie finger caught in the locking mechanism in the back. luckily, a good samaritan with shaking hands and khakis rushed to pick up the infant while i helped the woman extract herself from the stroller. for someone who hates blood, this was a bit too much for me, but we freed her and made sure she went straight to the hospital.

the rest of the afternoon followed in a similar fashion. our next stop was the bonner foundation where john and i were wisked off by the former president, wayne, in a kidnapping of sorts. leaving the foundation at the same time, wayne and i exchanged "hellos" and the next thing i knew he was jumping into his car, pulling up to us, and telling us to get in. in typical wayne fashion, john and i spent the next fifteen minutes chatting about life en route to drop off some paperwork for wayne's older son abe at princeton high. it was this little thing that made me re-appreciate the chaos of the bonner life and what this summer holds for me. right now i'm writing this for all of you faithful friends out there while i listen to the newest batch of music that anthony ronda has shared with me. (kudos.) until later.

goodbye 201, hello 609

sup, bonner mansion.

sixty days, four diverse housemates, forty-hour work weeks, and countless anecdotes.

welcome to north tulane street.

this blog is being written upon request from my friend jill (there's your shout-out.) for the next two months i'll be living in the cheerful town of princeton, nj, a short hour and a half drive from my home in the northern part of the state. i'll spend my days working as a policy options intern for the bonner foundation and waste away my nights strolling up and down nassau street aimlessly. tucked in-between frozen yogurt shops, stationary stores, farmer's markets, and a library that refuses to give me a card, i have a feeling that this small move is going to bring wonderful things. so stalk away and read about my mundane life. i hope you'll find it meaningful.